Match Date #1

At the request of a fan (and by fan I mean a friend I force to read this blog) I am going to attempt to not combust into a ball of shame and embarrassment, and rather pass those lovely feelings onto whoever wants to read a precious retelling of my awkward dates courtesy Match.com.

So here goes.

Saturday morning I met Dude Number One (who we will call Kal Penn because he is Indian American). We had planned to meet at 10:30 am at Jamba Juice but after waking up in the morning and freaking out that I really didn't want to do Match afterall, I leisurely made my way to the arranged meeting place and popped into a Gap across the street so I could be a perfectly timed five minutes late. This also provided me the perfect opportunity to observe my date without his knowing.

I try not to judge on appearance, I honestly do. However, there is a part of me that looks at someone, and they way they dress or put themself together and will often form a judgement based on this. If a guy doesn't care about how he presents himself, what does this say about other choices he might make? Or what he might expect from me? Call me particular or elitist but it means something. That being said, Kal Penn was not dressed for success.

In any case, I was determined to follow through, so I bit the bullet, marched across the street and introduced myself. Kal Penn was awkward--clearly nervous, but also spoke at such a low volume and in a strange tone of voice that I found him perplexing. We walked right up to the Jamba counter, and I ordered my regular "single wheat grass shot" and "sixteen fresh squeezed orange juice" while Kal Penn ordered some exotic smoothie with a name I didn't pay attention to.

He paid for my Jamba Juice. I had been told this might happen but was still sort of surprised when it did. Certainly a sweet gesture, but I don't know--I felt a little awkward about the whole thing. At this point (about 7 minutes in) we don't know each other, we don't even know if we are interested!

Anyways, after I did my best small talk while we waited for our drinks and I downed my wheat grass shot (this was mind-boggling to him), we headed outside to stroll with our beverages along the walkway that runs through Palisades Park. More small talk ensued, during which I learned about his job (trailer editor for FOX), his home (Mar Vista), and his background (from Poughkeepsie, went to Virginia Tech, was a computer programmer in DC). We walked down to the Santa Monica Pier and then turned around because he had to add some change to the meter where he parked. Because the conversation was awkward, I was not getting the vibe, and while I love dorks (I am one, come on), he was just too painfully geeky for me (he made a crack about how he saw people going to a club one night and thought, "Oh so that's the real Hollywood experience!" Yikes) so I decided we could part ways after he put money in the meter.

Ah but there was a reason he wanted to go put money in the meter. You see, he drove some ridiculous little Mercedes that just did not go along with the rest of his outward appearance (or the flashes of personality I had seen so far) but that I think he wanted to make sure I saw. I told him I had to go meet my roommates at the bank, it was fun, thanks for the Jamba Juice. Over and out.

On Monday Kal Penn shot me an email with the subject "Fun Hanging Out" that said:

Hey
It was quite fun hanging out and talking to you! Let me know if you'd like to hang again! You're really cool and interesting about stuff.

I just have to find more than 1 hour parking though :P.

Cool and interesting about stuff? Using an emoticon? And the tongue one no less? Dear God what have I gotten myself into?

I consulted with my roommate who is a Match veteran and she gave me the advice that the best way to turn down a guy on Match after you've been on a date is to not respond. So poor Kal Penn, I've left him hanging.

Whatever. Glad to have had the experience, get a nice awkward and painful date over with because yes, ladies and gentlemen, I've got another one coming up! Details will follow.