So I did my first ever sort of stand-up type thing EVER tonight (it wasn't stand up because I was reading something I already wrote) and it went really well.
So well in fact, that after the show, when I was walking out the door (because, like the sometimes socially-awkward gal I am, I like to bolt immediately after drawing attention to myself) some guy at the bar stopped me as I was walking out and said:
"You were the best."
"What?" I asked, because I was certain I had not heard correctly. There were like 8 other people doing stuff and mine was the shortest and the most different because it wasn't really on theme with the rest of the night and I was sweating a lot.
"Yours was the best."
"Thank you so much!" I said sweetly and then I ran right out of the bar.
My morning started out bad because I slept through my alarm and was a half hour late to work but then the day got better because I finished my pilot (that's 35 pages I WROTE you guys, I DID THAT!) and then right after I hit print and looked at my words I jetted off to this little comedy club and did my thing and some guy at the bar told me I was the best.
I feel... relieved (PEOPLE ACTUALLY LAUGHED! BECAUSE OF MY JOKES! ME!), but I also have a headache (probably from my glasses but I've decided I am going to wear glasses whenever I do these sorts of things because it weirdly helps me get into "character" which is a super silly thing for me to say if the character is just myself but I swear that it helped, you guys, I swear) and I also kind of feel like I want to cry because there is nothing more I want right now then to call my mom and tell her about my amazing day that started so terribly and ended so well and I can't call her and well, that just SUCKS SO HARD (I miss you Mom and I love you forever and I know you're watching over me I do, but sometimes, God, I just want to be able to pick up the phone and call you) but also I just feel like... I don't know what I feel like... like, maybe like I can do this. Like maybe if I can stay on this momentum and keep doing stuff and just keep on trying things I'll figure it out. I don't even know what "it" is. Maybe it's me or my life or my career goals or comedy or writing or just everything but I feel like I'm getting closer.
But whatever, the bigger deal here is that I did a comedy show and it went really well. And it's a good thing too because I've got another one on Saturday! OH SHIT! After the show I came home to an empty house which is rare when you have three other roommates and I thought that I should write this down, how I am feeling and I thought I would do it on Tumblr because that really is where I seem to be doing most of my blogging these days but then I thought, no, this is Jaw Wired Shut material. This is me. And I feel like there are only 2 people still reading this blog (are you out there? SHOW YOURSELVES!) but if there are it's the same people who've been reading me since I started this thing when I moved to LA in 2007 and look how far I've come!
And did you hear? I was the best, you guys! THE BEST!