So this morning I woke up with around 20 minutes to get ready for work, which was fine because I don't put all that much effort into my appearance on a regular basis as is, this just meant I had less time to do the things I really care about in the morning like make my bed or check my email or stare blankly at the mess ontop of my dresser and consider cleaning it but then not follow through.
I had one of those moments when I was starring at all the clothes in the closet, thinking "Ugh I hate everything" so I decided to wear this dress I've only worn once over a year ago. Thing about this dress is that it has two stains on it. The stains are fairly obvious, and both from Aquaphor, which I am addicted to and if you don't get it all on your lips and then still have some on your fingers and then touch your clothing you will stain it. And the first time I wore this dress, over a year ago, I did just that.
So I am waiting for someone to spot the stains and have begun imagining excuses such as "oh yeah a bird shit on me this morning when I was going on my daily nature walk" or "WHAT STAIN?!?" or "it's a bodily fluid (blank stare)" or "I think you are imagining things" or the truth: "It's because of my chapstick addiction."
Roomie told me last night she woke up around 3 am because she heard me coughing my face off. I hate that our walls are paper thin but this is also very useful information, because I am now thinking that due to January Bender I am very close to a cold. Time for vitamins and hydration. The only way I'm going to call in sick is if I am faking it. Or have a wardrobe-related meltdown.