One Week Later

Wow. I can't believe my last post was from the hospital. I have a vague memory of demanding my dad take me to the visitor waiting room where there was a computer so that I could check my email, facebook, and post to the blog. Oh I do not miss those bizarre walks through the hospital corridors, holding onto the back of my gown with one hand and my IV with the other, while I shuffled away, sometimes with my Dad, sometimes with a nurse, but always drooling.

Yes, I seem to have developed a drooling problem since surgery. This would, of course, be solely due to the fact that my lower lip is partially numb and my chin is completely numb. It's never really a problem when I am in bed, but when I am up and about I start drooling again. The worst was when I was still in the hospital and I would have to go to the bathroom and would sit down and the next thing I know I am drooling all over my legs. This then created a very difficult problem because my right hand was connected to all my IVs, while the left hand, significantly less advanced (I am not at all ambidextrous) than my right, struggled to balance the tasks of stopping the drooling and reaching for toilet paper. Ahh those were the days...

Since I have been home, things have been getting better, very slowly. I am taking each day at a time, noticing minor decreases in the swelling, or that I have more energy, or I can almost sleep through the night. The crazy thing is that the surgery was seven hours long. Seven hours! Which of course took a lot out of me, in addition to all the meds I was on right after surgery (morphine included... mmm narcotics... actually it made me want to vomit all the time which is difficult when your jaw is closed shut, so I hated it). I think the first week was so difficult as my body was not only adjusting to the new bone structure and subsequent pain, but trying to recover from the intense surgery itself.

Now, it's been over a week and I have become somewhat accustomed to spending my days doing a whole lot of nothing... it's pretty boring. The hardest part is the food--getting enough calories, protein, fiber, and all the other nutrients I need through only liquids. I am drinking a lot of Slim Fast, Ensure, Carnation Instant Breakfast, Odwalla Protein drinks, Stonyfield yogurt smoothies, and of course... tons of soup. All the food commercials on TV are starting to drive me nuts! I am already fantasizing about that first morsel of solid food I get to eat. Mmmmm delicious. Until then, I am a week in, which means only seven to go. Oh. My. God.

I made it!

Real quick because I am still in the hospital... I made it! Surgery was not fun and I was under the knife from 7 am until 2:30 pm, woke up with excruciating pain and tubes coming out of me from all over the place. The jaw is not wired shut, but set in place with rubber bands which means I am drinking through a syringe (but I am still on my IVs too). My face is so swollen I am nearly unrecognizable but my brother swears I already have the signs of what will become a cute button nose.

At the moment I am questioning why I did this because it is an experience I wouldn't wish on my greatest enemy. Hopefully the swelling will go down soon, they will take off a few rubber bands, and I can be comfortable at home in bed.

Thank you everyone for the texts, messages and emails, you be hearing more from me when I am up to it...

Can anxiety result in severe back pain? All signs point to yes.

Yeah so that minor back pain I woke up with this morning has morphed into something a little more intense. I am thinking it is the result of any one of the following:

(1) I wore heels Saturday night. That is difficult for me.
(2) I was incredibly drunk Saturday night, discovered a large bruise on my right knee Sunday morning, as well as a sore ankle, both probably related to point 1, and through some deductive logic, would suggest I took a spill at some point during the aforementioned inebriation period.
(3) I toss and turn in my sleep so much that I often wake up with a rat's nest of a hair-do, and feeling like I've just had a work out equivalent to a half hour on the bike.
(4) I am nervous about the jaw surgery.
(5) I have a sweating problem. (Unrelated but I just wanted to share.)

I am guessing it is a combination of the first four. So I am off to see the chiropractor. No really. Then it is a visit to the orthodontist where I have my surgical wires and hooks installed. Doesn't that sound fun?

Wait, is this really happening?

Okay so I am starting to get nervous... tomorrow is the big day. Major facial reconstruction. Significant bone movement. Redesigning my face. Becoming the Bionic Woman. I am certainly being overdramatic here but while I have spent the last month thinking how totally cool I am being about all this, I woke up this morning with a very stiff back and a big knot in my stomach. I am incredibly nervous. I suppose it is only natural, but I am talking so nervous that I couldn't even eat all of my delicious breakfast sandwhich from Murray's Bagels this morning. And this is the last day I get to actually EAT food. Here's hoping I will be able to fall asleep tonight... hopefully the sedatives they give me tomorrow morning in the hospital will take care of any lingering fears. In fact, I am assuming that before I know it I will wake up to discover it's done.

I have to spend a night (maybe two in the hospital) and who knows when I am going to be back online... but you can bet that when I am feeling well enough I will be writing on this blog and stalking people on Facebook. Thank God for the internet! Additionally, I now have Season 5 of 24 to keep me busy. Unfortunately my room here in NYC is always strangely hot, so let's hope I can bear the heightened temperatures while I convalesce for the next two weeks.

I've got to go do as much talking and eating as possible now, but I'll post again later... probably around 3:30 am when I still can't fall asleep...